Donald Trump Announces Bernie Sanders as Vice Presidential Bid


Breaking News – In a surprise move on his already spontaneous campaign trail, Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump announced this morning his nominee for vice president-Bernie Sanders.

“It’s gonna be YUGE,” said Trump, in a press conference filled with only white male reporters.

Trump continued by making many vague, unfulfillable promises about what he and Sanders would do as a team. In short, he really said nothing at all.

“Look, I really like the guy. We’re gonna do really, really, great things. I mean, the guy’s older than me, he’s just as white as me, and best of all he’s not Hillary Clinton. I’m not gonna be partnered with someone who has blood coming out of their you-know-what.”

Bernie Sanders has been quoted as refusing Trump’s nomination, stating the nomination comes as much of a shock to him as it does to the rest of the world. Sanders plans to continue slowly undermining Clinton’s campaign and converting liberal America to Democratic Socialism.